Awake my Soul
by manosdechicatripolar
Summary: Beck's plan to get closer to Tori over the summer backfires. An AU-ish story with Trina as a stereotypical hipster.


**A/N: First story ever! **

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Summer vacation had started four days ago and Beck was more than ready for it to end. It had started very promising: Jade and him were still together and hadn't had a fight in over two weeks and if that wasn't a good omen, then Beck didn't know what was; His hair had been looking particularly good and Robbie had somehow gotten a girlfriend that seemed to actually like him so he didn't have to be his wingman all summer long. But then the Jade thing happened.

The afternoon they finished with school Jade had called him asking to meet at the Skybucks near the mall and as they hadn't really gone out in a while- or talked, really- he was excited. He put on an actually clean plaid shirt, blow dried his hair to perfection and even bought a bouquet of lilac daisies for Jade. He had just locked the door to his RV when it clicked in his head that Jade has said they needed to talk.

He had learned to accept the possibility that Jade might break up with him the moment she saw his face a long time ago, but he still wanted to do what he could to avoid a break up. When he walked into the establishment Jade was already there. Beck took his place in line and while he waited he tried to analyze the situation: Jade had asked him to come to a public place instead of breaking up over the phone so he assumed there would be minimal yelling, she was sitting facing a window with her back to him so she possibly wouldn't throw her drink in his face. Hope began to blossom in his heart that maybe she genuinely wanted to talk and this was just a coffee date.

After receiving his order, Beck walked toward the table. He sat at Jade's right since the other chair was taken by Jade's bag. She looked up. "Hey" standard greeting, good sign. No frowning, good. He wasn't covered in iced caramel macchiato, extra good. Beck smiled, he so had this wrong.

"Hi hi hi" Jade raised a brow but remained silent and unsmiling. Silence stretched and Beck was feeling sillier by the second. Why couldn't he just say 'hey' and act cool? Jade wasn't looking at him, she was picking at her cuticles. Bad, bad sign. She took a deep breath, Beck was freaking out internally. What if she didn't want to break up and it was something much worse? he really was not ready to pick out baby names.

"I'm gay" Beck didn't know if he should be relieved or not. On one hand, not pregnant, but on the other... gay. Lesbian. His girlfriend was gay. Jade was looking at him now, she looked expectant and scared. It was that fear in her eyes that made him swallow the 'no you're not, we're dating' that was about to spill out of his lips. She didn't need him being confused, she didn't need him denying what surely took her long to accept, she needed him to be told that her confession didn't change anything, that she was still perfect and lovely and that he would always support her. She needed Beck to be her friend. So he took deep breath and prepared to tell her just that.

"What?" was what came out of his mouth instead.

"I'm a lesbian, Beck" Jade was visibly uncomfortable under Beck's gaze and he began to get a weird prickly feeling on the nape of his neck. Jade took his hands in hers, they were cold. Beck knew he had to say something or at least top staring but his body and his brain seemed to have completely separated.

"Could you say something?" her voice was so tiny it made Beck think about holding her and playing with her hair but he couldn't move, the weird prickly feeling had started to spread down his back Beck cleared his throat twice after Jade's eyes started to moisten.

"Is umm..." his voice sounded funny so he cleared his throat before trying again. "Is it Tori?" they way Jade scrunched her nose and furiously shook her head made him laugh and that made Jade smile.

Jade sighed and closed her eyes like she didn't want to say what came next. "it's Cat" Jade's smile was soft as she looked back at Beck "it's always been Cat."

Beck exhaled through his nose, he was much calmer now so his next words came a bit easier. "Guess we should break up then" the weird prickly feeling refused to leave and made it hard to think correctly so he asked "Does she even know?" in a tone that was not necessary but he didn't take it back.

"She knows" Jade didn't elaborate and Beck didn't want to be any more rude so he didn't make any more questions.

Beck smiled "over we are, then" Jade squeezed his hand

"thank you" she smiled and Beck smirked "anytime" she slapped his arm but smiled

"I've gotta go, have to pick up the dog from the vet" it was a lie, Doug was perfectly healthy and probably asleep in the porch of his parents' house but Jade didn't need to know that. He got up and kissed Jade on the forehead before leaving.

Beck checked the time in his phone; the whole thing lasted twelve minutes, coffee order included, and he had spent most of that time staring at Jade. He was ten minutes away from home when he realized he had forgotten his coffee, untouched, on the table and that the flowers were still in his passenger seat.

Beck was lying in his bed staring at the ceiling, having just changed his TheSlap relationship status when it hit him.

_It has always been Cat. _

All those times Jade had broken up with him, called him crying in the middle of the night drunk, all the times she had apologized for cheating on him. It had always been Cat.


End file.
